08 January 2010

my guts/motivations/inner workings/ neuroses

I am constantly thinking about the water and boats and sailing away.

my heroes/people who inspire me: Rei Kawakubo, JD salinger, Little Edie Beale, Nan Goldin, Gore Vidal, Wong Kar Wai, the pastry chef at La Duree, my mother, the guy at the bar who pulled my aside when I was 21 and warned me that one day I will be invisible too, Amy and David sederis, Sandra Bernhard and my crazy old neighbor (who always dresses up, even to take out the trash).

I have an insane sense of childlike adventure and very few things freak me out besides infinity.

Jukeboxes fascinate and destroy me (depending on selection of course).

It's my nature to cheer for the underdog almost always.

I crack myself up so much and that can be annoying to others, I'm sure.

When I am doing housework, I will ask myself questions about current events... and then answer my own questions!!

I can be all or nothing aka hot/cold, aka a total fucking nightmare.

People who need constant validation and attention bore the fuck out of me and make me nervous.

I have a strong desire to be surrounded by good manners but I love, love , love a foul mouth.

I am not always sure what part of my memory is real and what part is an invention. So many things I have dreamed into being, just to feel okay.(Equal parts comforting and embarrassing)

I never wonder about space travel, although I attach meaning to almost every full moon or falling star.

Attending catholic school made me believe that my thoughts were either the devil or god communicating with me. I used to constantly apologize for my thoughts via my thoughts. (Maybe that's where I learned to hold it in).

I don't always feel things as they happen (unless it's in the water or it's music). Often times it takes me a few hours to catch up to how happy something/someone has made me.

People who cannot eat with a knife and fork at the same time break my heart a little bit. 

A good chef always brings tears to my eyes.

I always rub dirt on new shoes before I wear them just to avoid people asking if I bought new shoes.  wtf?

I could eat a million pieces of cake. In fact, I think I would prefer to skip a party all together and just be alone with the cake. (sad, really).

I am easily smothered by people with the best intentions and that frustrates me.

I am obsessed with clean sheets and towels. (High end hotels with crisp sheets and huge fluffy towels are basically my idea of porn).

I can't leave the house messy, and when I have tried, I always have to turn back to clean. It sort of sucks.

I don't like eating food that came from a kitchen with kids in it and if you ever tell me that your child help make something you want me to eat, I definitely will not be eating it.  Kids always sneak in a nose/butt/crotch/ear/head picking when you aren't looking, (trust me).

I hate straws and sweaty plastic cups so don't look at me all weird when I order my iced coffee in a paper cup.

I don't like high definition It just makes people look like shit.
If a movie is marketed to lonely, desperate women hoping for a happy ending, I will probably, almost always, love it.

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