06 January 2010

bad dates

I am sorry for the long gap between posting.  I had been feeling blue (see "waterworks") and with the holidays, freezing cold, etc.  I have just been feeling uninspired. On top of that, for the first time in 13 years, I went on a bad date.

"B"  was back in town from LA and I had decided we should see 'Up in the Air'.  I remembered hearing that it was somewhat of a feel good film and I thought the whole George Clooney thing might put me in a more romantic mood.  I really wanted to see Precious, but it seemed a bit much for a first date.
Anyways, "B" is computer tech and I have always had a thing for nerds or  that geek chic look and I thought this would be fun.  I was dating outside my typical "box" and felt good about it.
Unfortunately, he talked loudly the entire time leading up to the opening scene, and as soon it was over, proclaimed "I knew that's what would happen!"   I felt stupid that I didn't know that's what would happen.  This wasn't going well.
I suggested we go to a french bistro I love around the corner from the theater for a drink.  He has the server describe the specials twice.  He settles on  the chicken, which is the plat du jour. I decided on the risotto (sometimes it's just best to order something really easy to eat to avoid something catastrophic happening).
He can't seem to figure out what the white vegetable is on his plate, even though the waitress has already explained the dish, twice.  Had he actually listened, he would know they were turnips.   I said " I am pretty sure they are turnips".  He doesn't think so, and keeps wondering aloud what they could be. He puts them in his mouth, rolls them around, and looks confused.   At this point, I am positively having an awful time and I am fantasizing about strangling him.  Even the wine isn't helping.
His stories are so painstakingly long that I have to stop him in the middle to tell him that I am confused by what he is even talking about.  He seems to  think it's cute that I can't seem to follow him.   He then explains that he is very precise with his communication skills because he works with people who are easily confused.   It's ironic he should say it in that way.   Anyways,  he isn't hearing a word I say, even when I explain that his idea of communication is actually giving me a headache. He just smiles and keeps talking..... about nothing.
Needless to say I won't be seeing him again and I don't have anything sweet to write.  I have tried, trust me.
Having gotten out of a 10 year relationship 1 1/2 years ago, I have been out of the dating pool a long time and it isn't nearly as fun as I remember.   But this is the year I am going to put myself out there again and open myself up to the possibility being in love again.   I am optimistic.
keep your fingers crossed.


  1. I have similar hopes for myself. I'm sorry it went so bad. I know you don't know me, but I think I could show you a better time. The French Bistro sounded really nice. I live in Lexington, KY, where it is currently 14 degrees out, but there is at least three French restaurants. One in particular has these beautiful glass doors that can be opened and simply open up the whole restaurant to the outdoors. I love it. Haven't been in forever.

    Good luck on your year. :D


  2. Sounds like a great first date to me....I mean the movie, the bistro the food. Not the guy.
    Not to fret, there are plenty of other gay fish in the sea, and they'd probably know a turnip when they see one.

  3. Love Is Back!

    With that attitude you can't go wrong ... good luck.:)

  4. Hahahaha! I laugh for the joy I get from reading your writing! And I am glad you are back. Any chance the bad date guy will read this? I love when you said you wanted to strangle him. Honest and hilarious.

    Much luck to you in finding finding love!

  5. you guys are sweet, thank you!

  6. Into each life some rain must fall. There are going to be a few bad dates. Unfortunately, knowing this doesn't make them any easier to endure. Better luck next time!

  7. You just have to keep trying, I think.

  8. Dang- this first date sound like a 20 year marriage...Dating, you are brave!

  9. I met & fell in love with my husband 30 years ago... just when I had come to peace, deep inside myself, that I didn't need to be with another person to be happy... & then it happened.